Wednesday, April 9, 2008

3/14/05 No Title

EDIT: Still more musings from my Live Journal as I tried to understand my depression.

March 14, 2005 No Title

Looking back at my posts it seems evident that I might have some sort of rapid cycling bipolar problem. Read my post on the 11th. I was gung ho. I had so many ideas and projects. Read all the posts that I made that day, my brain just couldn't stop buzzing. Then by the 14th I'm down in a dark hole again. I don't know how to handle this. I feel like I have so many problems. The avoidant stuff, the depression, the mania.....I'm trying very hard to look at this calmly and move ahead and not let myself spiral downward. But it is hard. I feel like I'm ruled by my teeter tottering emotional state. How can I find balance? My mood swings as of late are unpredictable and seemingly uncontrollable. I don't know how to cope.........

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